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  • As soon as I walked into work today, I was greeted by a resident that is known for her belief God. She called me over and asked me how my "friend" meaning you was doing. This surprised me because I had only once briefly mentioned our friendship. Well months later she remembered and was asking me if you still played guitar. She then surprised me by saying that we need to get married, to stop living in sin. I looked at her surprisingly and told her we were just friends that we weren't even dating. With the most serious look on her face she told me God told her were going to get married and that you were going to send me a Christmas present.

  • I stood there with my mouth hanging wide open. Shocked beyond words.

  • I don't know if her words scared me or thrilled me honestly. Possibly a bit of both.

"Honesty, Turning Sex Into the Scene"

Dear Nathan, 

Remember when I thought those were the correct lyrics to the song “Mr. Brightside.” You laughed and laughed.

But if you think about it…

It really rings true in my life. I could sleep with this guy named Derek. He’s wanted it for a long period of time.. But i’ve honestly been waiting for you. I have been..

I don’t even know why anymore. It’s not like you’ve ever tried to change our ‘relationship status’ again.

I’ve been in love with you for so long that I can’t even remember a time I wasn’t anymore.

 Yesterday.. I wrote you a love many I’ve written in the past at work and somehow it got lost.. Maybe that’s what happened to us. We just got a little lost. 

April Showers Bring May Flowers, But What Does Life Bring?

Happy Belated Birthday Nathan. I know I wished you a happy birthday already and even wrote you a virtual birthday card..which is pretty awesome if you ask me but I didn’t get to wish it via tumblr..therefore it must not have counted. 

I feel like my life is finally getting on the path it’s supposed to be on right now. I’m taking this EMT class that is teaching me that I really don’t know anything at all when it comes to saving people medically. All I do is try to save them mentally.

This month has been a welcome break from the stresses at school. I’m not working as much as I’d like too, but honestly I feel like this break is needed. This class and balanced work schedule is bringing the perfect mix of relaxation and work. 

Maybe life is working out as it should. Life lessons and learning how to forgive and move forward. 

3 Years in 3 Hours

Three years ago in three hours.. My life changed irrevocably forever. I heard your voice and was a goner. Those three years feel like an eternity to me now. 

I still love you and am so thankful I had the courage to take a chance three years ago. I couldn’t imagine who I’d be if I never met you. Even if it doesn’t end in a happy ending-you’ve made me a better person. 

I tn you N,

P.S. I miss you too.  

Killing Me Softly, with your words

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! I’m serious. Where is your head? Is this all because our three year anniversary is approaching in two days? Is that what this is all about? 

Why would you tell me that you told your mom about us and then stop talking for hours? Are you trying to kill me? All i could think about all day was you. God Nathan you kill me. 

You say you miss me then you don’t talk. It doesn’t make sense to me. 


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